Monday, February 01, 2010

SAHM I Am . . . .Or Not

I'm having one of those days. I have had thousands of them since I began my stint as a Stay At Home mom in 1998. I feel like a dog chasing its tail. I have a mountain of work to get to and all I can muster the energy to do is hold Greta on the couch with her Tupperware Barf Bowl. I do laundry. I make peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. I clean up gobs of toothpaste. I build Lego trucks. I untangle American Girl hair. And so on. I'm OK with all of that. It comes with the territory of the choice I made to stay home. My frustration lies in the fact that I seem to be the only mom who doesn't love her stay at home mom-ness ALL THE TIME. Or at least according to Facebook every other SAHM thinks they have the greatest job in the world and loves spending every waking and non-waking moment with their kids. Are all these moms lying or am I truly the only one who gets sick of being a human kleenex all day? I chose to stay home because I thought it was important to be the one with my kids. I wanted to make the choices for how they spent their time. Problem is I am the one to blame for how their spend their time. . .is there any defense for "Yo Gabba Gabba"?

I can't even complete the thought right now. Someone is screaming and I can't ignore it anymore.

5 comments:

ReeRee said...

Hang in there!! I am one of those moms that did not enjoying staying home every minute. I am not one of those warm fuzzy moms who bake with the kids or have an endless supply of crafts to do with the kids. It took me a long time to be ok with that. We ate dinosaur chicken nuggets 5 days a week and looked forward to the time that Bob the Builder would start. There were some days I just sat there with messy hair in sweats on the couch with the kids because that's all the energy I had. I still have days like that, only my kids are in school. I do not regret staying home with them, but I'm sure I could have done a better job...but in the long run, the kids are happy, healthy and safe. Isn't that all we strive for in the end?? Hang in there!!

i am not said...

I am that same way many times. When I have more balance in my life I'm able to think of things differently. As you know from my blog, this is an ongoing battle in my life - balance. There are long days where I just simply want to walk out the door and let everyone fend for themselves while I take a solo road trip to wherever my car takes me. I've felt resentment and bitterness over the choice I made. Like I said, this is a constant, ongoing battle in my life. I don't believe the moms who talk like they have it all together and love every minute of it. I just don't.

Amanda said...

I SO do not enjoy being a mom 24/7...and those Facebook posters are liars!!! lol...

Anonymous said...

You are not alone! I know that I don't want to be the working mom that would still have to come home and take care of everything, but that doesn't mean that I enjoy every minute of being home with my kids! It really is the most stressful job there is, like you said, we are solely responsible for how our kids turn out, LOL! Just remember, it is ok to be stressed out. Can you think of a single job where you wouldn't be? Why should this one be any different!

mommy to an angel said...

I've come to realize that the every-thing-is-lovely SAHM posts on facebook is an attempt at making me feel better...keeping up with the Joneses (not necessarily you, Amanda). I'm guilty of these kinds of status updates...mostly when I'm feeling guilty for yelling at my kids for the millionth time over something STUPID or when I've been ignoring them and playing on the computer.
I love having friends who are honest about being a mom! It's hard and it often stinks, but I wouldn't trade it...well, maybe on some days!