FIVE THINGS TO KEEP YOU AWAKE
1. Diet Coke
2. Red Bull and Vodka (thanks Jefferson for introducing me to that new drug!)
3. Nick at Nite
4. Yelling at toddlers who throw things
5. Talking on the phone to anyone who will listen
FIVE BEST MEALS TO BRING TO SOMEONE WHO NEEDS A MEAL
1. Lasanga~re-heats most excellently
2. Chicken and stuffing~nice and bland for new mommies
3. Italian beef~can be made is small portions when one can eat at 3am
4. Bucket 'o KFC~just cuz I love it
5. Brownies or bars of any sort~great to eat with one hand
FIVE BEST WAYS TO START THE SENTENCE "I JUST HAD A BABY"
1. I can't possibly pay my bills on time, I just had a baby!
2. I can't wear make-up, I just had a baby!
3. Yes, I'd love an extra helping of french fries, I just had a baby!
4. Please carry my groceries, I just had a baby!
5. Sorry, I can't possible make it to that boring meeting, I just had a baby!
Free 7 Day Healthy Meal Plan (April 22-28)
7 hours ago
5 comments:
Love the meeting excuse... I've used that one a few times myself!
And brownies are definitely a good treat... that, and a huge tin of Godiva chocolate! That was one of my favorites... especially at 3am!
What about "Don't expect me to be all chipper today, I just had a baby!" Of course I can think of just about any reason to end that sentence:
Don't expect me to be all chipper today...
I just got my period.
I'm late.
My kids are driving me nuts.
My husband is crabbing at me.
My house is a mess.
I stepped on the scale this morning and clearly the scale is malfunctioning because it reads that I gained 3 pounds this week... oh great, now I have to purchase a new scale.
Even though all of the above may be true for me, I'm still usually pretty chipper! :-)
On wednesday when I got pulled over for expired license plates I got to use I couldn't possibly have gotten them because I just had a baby!!
It worked!!
He must not have paid any attention to the fact that they expired MAY 15!!
He must have felt bad for me cuz the baby was screaming, Sam was trying to unbuckle to "help" the baby, and the other two were in the back singing at the top of their lungs to "calm" the baby. I looked like the MOST stressed out soccer mom ever!!!! Who cares though it saved me some money!
Another great use for the phrase...hold up a cute shirt and say to strangers I'm so glad I can wear this I just had a baby! And of course they will respond..."You look great!" It works every time...still works for me...= )
I had to refill the vicodin RX, I just had surgery...I have to go back to the couch now, I just had surgery,
or, you could try,
that rag isn't cold enough, could you put it in the freezer, I just turned 40 and I'm Hot!
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